Sherlock Gnomes is the absolute rock bottom of children’s animation. Everything big studio animations do wrong, Sherlock Gnomes does worse, becoming a pool of tripe with many, many, garden gnomes trying to swim through it like a group of un-synchronised bobble heads.

When gnomes start disappearing from gardens across London, there is only one gnome who can solve the mystery; Sherlock Gnomes (Johnny Depp). He must team up with Watson (Chiwetel Ejiofor), Gnomeo (James McAvoy) and Juliet (Emily Blunt) to discover the whereabouts of the missing gnomes before it is too late!

The premise doesn’t even suggest a thrilling adventure. Children’s mysteries often fail to impress, replacing mystery with a condescending look at childish entertainment. Paddington 2 showed exactly how to produce and showcase a mystery aimed at a younger generation last year, and Sherlock Gnomes seems to have sat through that one snoozing.

Sherlock Gnomes 2

The film lacks any form of creativity and class. There’s a weird obsession with replacing the word f*ck with ‘fertiliser’, coming across as childish and degrading, the characters of Gnomeo and Juliet are suitably standard, with Gnomeo seeming as if he has just finished eating his cheeky Nandos with the lads, and a storyline so predictable, Pete the Predictable Prawn could have written it. Maybe he did.

It’s pretty obvious they picked the title before thinking about the rest of the film, and the more evident that is, the worse the outcome will be. So, realistically, is anyone surprised? Not really. Not at all.

1/5

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